Monday, June 13, 2005

Osmania biscuit VI-- Lingam's train ride

This is a letter I got from Lingam yesterday. He says that he has good English, but that he loves to use local words and phrases amidst only to show that he is proud of his culture...
is that a fact?

Dear Dost,
Lingam here. I have safely reached Bangalore and found a place to live. Train was very fursat se, you know! They told me that because it was a special train, it stopped in small stations for a long time. If you ask me, special trains should go faster and dabbuna complete the journey, but this is not our Saleem Nagar--that train ride was antha lolli lolli anuko raadu!

As you know, it has been many years since I travelled by train. So it was a little new for me. When I got into the train and went to my berth, a little girl was already sleeping there. I looked around for her parents, but no one was interested. I didnt feel like waking up that little girl. I thought her parents would come after the train starts and sat beside her. The train started, and I wanted to rest a little, but the girl didnt wake up and no one came to take her. I started asking other people there-- "Is this your girl?" No one said yes. You know-- It was a total tamaasha!

Adding to that, I suddenly had to go to the bathroom-- that too "number 2"... I went for the toilet, but it said "Please avoid using toilets when the train is stationary." Dhath teri.... Trains are so developed these days-- they sell even books and pencils these days. I thought they will sell scales also and wanted to ask for one for you because you need them right? (Lingam always remembers only the word "scale" of Very Large Scale Inegration). I did not feel like going to toilet where they sell such posh things useful for big study (Lingam's word for higher studies) . What to do, I controlled and sat.

Then I remembered your lecture that day on enjoying train rides. Jarra relaxed little. I too started enjoying all passing things-- trees, houses, bridges, names of small stations, and I started reading the boards in English , you know-- It was "MAHABOOBNAGAR" station-- arey! I know some people from Mahaboobnagar. Actually very famous there. Every rickshaw man knows them. I was actually feeling nice, then the train started moving and I saw another board-- "CANTEEN", then "CLOAK ROOM", then "TOILET"-- Deenamma! I suddenly remembered I had to go to toilet.

And then, when I was very much in trouble, someone new came to me and asked "Is this your girl?" I didnt know what to say... All other people in compartment--I still remember how they laughed! How my damaak rotated you know! And adding to that, ijjat kachra anuko!

Unknowingly, my hand went into my pocket and I received my third and biggest shock-- I forgot to bring my osmania biscuit packet from home. Actually, that is why I am writing this letter. Though Bangalore is a new city, I searched for 2 days, but I couldnt find a shop that sells osmania biscuits. Can you please post them to me? But be careful-- they should not break! I know you are smart enough (he means rich enough!) to find a way to post them unspoiled.

your friend,
Lingam Yadav
Xth Passed (Private)

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